Happy Monday, friends! Ahh...It feels so good to be back blogging. I missed you! In case you didn't see Friday's post, check it out here. Today I wanted to share about something that I have been thinking about a lot lately: Fear. More importantly, pushing through your fears. I will start by saying, that at least for me, pushing through my fears is often easier said than done. It is definitely a process.
Needless to say, I'm not talking about healthy fears, like being scared of a bear, or going into soccer mom mode when you have to hit the brakes quickly while driving and throw your arm across the passenger (I can't be the only person that does this?). I'm talking about fears like staying in a consistently unhappy relationship (love, friendship, work-related, etc.) because it is easier than speaking up about what's not working, or not making the next move in your career because you're afraid of failing and not being good enough, or even not trying the yoga class that you've really been wanting to try but feel that you may be too fat to even try it. Side note: These are all personal experiences that I have had in the past, which is how I know that fear shows up in so many areas of life.
Looking back, I have this huge laundry list of times that I was so fearful, that I just didn't do something. So many times, it's ridiculous. Part of me gets really frustrated at my younger-self and wants to shake her and say, "Wake the F up! You are wasting so much time being fearful and unhappy! This isn't nearly as big of deal as you are making it! YOU CAN DO IT!" But then, I have this other part of me that knows that all of those fears were part of my process, and brought me to exactly where I am today. And for that, I am profoundly grateful.
When I went to NYC last year for Holistic MBA Live, Stacey Morgenstern (one of the co-founders) said something that really stuck with me: "Fear is excitement on pause." I look at that as if the momentum of joy has just momentarily frozen in time, and is waiting for the right moment to melt and unfold. Isn't that such a wonderfully different way to look at fear? I thought so!
"Fear is excitement on pause."
Don't get me wrong, fear still comes up for me constantly. However, now I look at it differently. I take a deeper look and try to recognize why it is showing up for me, and the lesson I am supposed to learn. If the fear hasn't subsided, I still try to push through it (sometimes this takes three minutes, sometimes this takes three months). For example, my friend Jill and I were facilitating our Be-you-tiful YOU! workshop yesterday, and about two days before the workshop I started to get super fearful that not enough people would attend. I kept questioning myself: What if no one shows up? What if I have nothing important to say, and Jill has to carry the whole thing? What if it goes chaotic and doesn't flow? What if, what if, what if???
Sunday morning I woke up and said to myself "Even if it's just Jill and I, it's going to be awesome and fun. I'm proud of myself for putting myself out there and doing this!" And guess what? It was very well attended, we got great feedback, and it WAS awesome and fun!
My feeling is that even if something doesn't go the way you planned, but you did it anyway, there is always triumph and success. There is always an opportunity to learn and be grateful.
When is a time that you pushed through fear, and came out the other side with a great lesson? I'd love to hear!