Dad and I, circa 2013

Dad and I, circa 2013

Hi beauties!

As I shared on Friday, I sort of fell off the blogging world, and took a few weeks off from posting.  It wasn't exactly planned either...

I'll start by saying that my Dad gave me full permission to share. 

I got an early morning group text (to my brothers and I) from my Mom on 3/22 basically saying, "Say a prayer for your Dad, I'm taking him to the ER.  He's been having back pain."  I really didn't react too strongly, but rather said a quick prayer, and texted back: "What's going on?  Maybe he needs an adjustment [chiropractor]?"  I should have prefaced first by saying that both my parents have always been healthy, aren't on any medications, and neither complain of "aches and pains."  They're blessed (still are), and I am so thankful for that.

So, I didn't hear anything for a while, and the more I started to think about it (and because my Dad actually consented to going to the ER), I started to get a little worried.  I called my Mom while I was taking a lunch break, and she proceeds to say "The doctor thinks he had a heart attack, and they are admitting him.  He'll have an angiogram in a few hours."

Wait, what?!  Back up a second.  A heart attack? 

I immediately threw a bunch of random stuff in a bag, grabbed Charlie (Greg was out of town), hopped in the car, zipped up to Ventura, and went straight to the hospital.  Dad ended up having to have an angioplasty done and a stent put it.  This was all completely stressful and surreal for my Mom and I, and I could only imagine what was going on in my Dad's head.  More happened over the course of the week, but really, none of it is that relevant at this point.  We are just happy my Dad is alive and doing well.  That is what's most important.

All of this was very scary for our family, and really put life into perspective for each of us.  For me, it brought up a lot of anxiety that I didn't know existed.  It was a horrible feeling, which was why taking a break from blogging was completely necessary.  The anxiety has slowly been dissipating, but for a while, it was as if I was on high alert 24/7.  I didn't want to leave the room without my phone, I was constantly checking up on my family, and I hated that I was over an hour away from Ventura.  I kept questioning life, which was something that felt completely unnatural for me.

Dad and I, circa 1988

Dad and I, circa 1988

Even though the heart attack was an awful experience that I don't want to ever happen again, I feel blessed by the lessons learned, and even more blessed that my Dad is here and healthy. Love you, Dad!

Thank you all for being here, sharing this with me, and being a safe sounding board for vulnerability.  I appreciate you all!

xo.  Jen